Saturday, May 19, 2012

366 Days later...40 + 1.

Phew. One year into 40 and this monthly writing excercise has taught me a lot about myself while also solidifing what I already know about myself, both good and bad. Know Thyself. Not such a bad mantra. If you know who you are and ACCEPT IT (that's the tricky part) the day-to-day becomes easier. Relationships become more honest. You make decisions about what you want to change about yourself or just say forget it with no regrets.

This doesn't mean I have found the secret to feeling good about myself 100% of the time. But I certainly don't dwell on my imperfections...anymore! I accept myself as PERFECTLY IMPERFECT. I chug along and try to change things that really bother me. But, I don't beat myself up when I can't quite accomplish those changes as fast as I would like.

Most importantly, I LIKE myself. And I believe others like me too :). Some folks don't believe that being liked should matter so much. And that's ok...for them! I believe that when you are genuinely and sincere about ensuring respect and dignity for others that you deal with on a daily basis is a good thing. Don't mistake kindness for weakness and stupidity. Sometimes my choice not to react is a political one. Other times it is a sincere choice to pick my battles. Other times, it's really not that important to react. Remember, I like myself. And no one has the power to to chip away at my spirit unless I allow it. The moment I feel that my self-esteem or self-worth is compromised, I move on and eliminate the negativity from my life. I have done that with boyfriends and I have done that with jobs. And I'll continue to do that as needed.

So as I begin my 41st year on this earth, I keep it moving. I keep it real. I keep it down to earth. I continue to hold my family and friends dear. I continue to develop as a professional and as a parent. I continue to struggle with my housekeepking abilities, financial acumen (or lack there of) and my weight. I continue to find new and improved ways to become a better person. I hope you continue to stay tuned and keep up with my journey.

Think deeply, speak gently, love much, laugh aloud, work hard, give freely, and be kind.

She unfurls her wings. She speaks her mind. She is a beautiful parcel of boldness and grace, all wrapped together, brilliant. Shining. The more of her own light she allows to shine, the  more others shine too. From high up, she imagines they must look like a constellation.